I have a few things to touch on here.
First, I want to talk about hunting poodles.
I found a magazine at work, and it said something about hunting poodles on the cover. Now, I don't care what your opinion about poodles is, they may be silly looking and froo-froo and yippee, but that is no reason to hunt them. I was outraged at the implications as I opened the magazine to find out where to send my strident letter to the editor, and it turned out the article was discussing using poodles to hunt. well OK but this is almost as bad. Here you are, most likely a man, and obviously having issues with your " manhood " else why would you be hunting Bambi's mommy with an assault rifle in the first place, doubtless a member of the NRA sayin "guns didn't kill Bambi's mommy, disney did " and driving a Hummer too, to boot. You show up at the forest to meet your friends who all have labs, and retrievers, and wolverines and tasmanian devils and such like fierce hunting dogs, and you are like, " this is Fifi, my hunting dog " Now that is going to cause psychic damage when they laugh you all the way to trying out for community theatre .
Secondly, I would like to announce that we have decided to get an airconditioner for Caydee,
as she has been really stricken by the hideous hot spell we are having.
Thirdly, I read an incredibly good book. It is called "All that I Have " by Castle Freeman Jr., and it is sharp, funny and other stuff too. I will maybe post about it to this book club I joined, but this book club nominated some vampire book as the best book of 2008, and I don't feel as though I fit in there. I mean, if all you ever read is crap, what is the point of talking about it? Like, omg she fell in love with this cute guy and he turned out to be a vampire , well hello did she not notice the fangs? I read books that are above me, which isn't hard, but I would like to talk to people about them, to see if others could help shed some insight on the books, to help me understand. I actually like to think that the author is cleverer than me, I mean you may have read my book, "The Phlebotomist's secret: tales of secret love in the night shift lab " which is basically about a couple of hospital workers who have a secret love, and one of them turns out to be a vampire, and it wasn't the Respiratory Therapist. OK you say, If you are so smart, then why didn't your Phlebotomist book end up on the NY Times bestseller list for, like, ever,
and OK I am crying now are you happy ? of course you are because I am an elitist and you are an honest God-fearing ( which God, I don't Know ) American who doesn't have airs, so it is a clear case of good versus evil, or is it a witch hunt. The question is, does it end with me repenting of my evil ways, and becoming a good person who reads Vampire books with the rest of the people working on the fourth floor, or do I end up with a stake through my heart? To find out, you will have to read my new book, I was a Teen-aged elitist, until I turned into a were-wolf and ate everybody, Starting with the Hunters who Killed my friend, Bambi's Mommy. It is a long title, but it is a complex exploration of the human desire to fit in, or kill everyone trying.
Also I illustrated it, in Anime style.
1 comment:
This is funny because it is true, and sad because it is true,
Sincerely,
another loser
Post a Comment